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I Need Radical Backup

by My Psychoanalyst

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1.
I know surrounding are me are children reacting against what they can’t break So they will break People change & alter all the time Steadily i change the taste into a crime While watching the enemy of taste in me utterly ignore the enemy I can’t trust But I’m watching you You know surrounding me are adults reacting against what they can’t touch So they won’t touch Too bad that I pretended so much Utterly the voices closest to my mind are watching the enemy of taste in me I must ignore the memory i can’t trust I’m watching you
2.
Cinderella 03:55
You & me sat nervously You & me & them make three Life gets sweeter the more I concede Oh but no one will kill me but me You & me solemnly edging toward parody Getting bored with what I want to be Just little you & little me Nothing is there when I wake Too much I always face When I take things too far; too far is never enough & regret is there whatever I do Now I can see that it gets to you So it comes to this Vague leaning to meanings that I miss Though you hardly make it easy Merely refusing to see me Monday nights spent being patronised by a few familiar faces But nothing will be there when I wake Well I tripped into a table & twenty vodkas all landed in my mouth & now I’m here doing things I shouldn’t, see? You & me & I’m happy When I take things too far; too far is never enough & regret is there whatever I do Now I can see that it gets to you So it comes to this Vague leaning to meanings that I miss Though you hardly make it easy Merely refusing to see me We must laugh the tears all away
3.
Converse 03:28
Where the profit lay Please don’t double take The tongues of others Double take Be my friend All the same My body rabid with entropy I know that you could Please make the effort to make me look good Be my friend Like Mohammad Ali said Be my friend over again I’m afraid no-one can account for human error You corner me, and then corner me I know I bleed just analyse me We’d still complain Coming out of a cloud We’d still be friends The quiet & the loud We’d still be friends I want you to know You are my friend In demand
4.
& So it Goes 05:50
Dishevelled Revel in that fact Tired & bored but wandering around at last Get it a little; think a little On your feet or on your toes Far too many strangers ready & willing to punch my nose Taking umbrage Hurting pride though not for really what’s inside Pathetic waste of time & space You don’t really know & it shows & so it goes Lay asleep on the grass in front of a new place My town is changing fast Though I don’t get it so forget it Keep repeating what’s with me Far too obsessed & depressed about my personality Like apathetic self hate is a virtue for the lonely It made me realise my life isn’t just me What’s wrong with me?
5.
Eight 03:29
I think it’s true I feel its right To look at stuff you can no longer describe I now despise Get away from me Say you’re sorry It’s a fool who cares for what no one thinks Get away from me Say goodbye adequately Sorry for being alone The torture of home is jealousy I might right I might be fine It’s gotten to the point where I can no longer decide Apples fall from trees & roll away with the breeze simply only to tease away the possibilities Get away from me Say goodbye adequately Sorry for being alone The torture of home is being alone
6.
I wandered out into the choking city familiar Any people particulars you care to mention Cannot be the one The sheer unsettling embarrassment factor that maintains nothing beyond what really matters Cannot be the one
7.
Procedure Standard procedure Empty, endure Accept happiness Gloating, bloating Never knowing that growing, knowing nothing has the point that requires effort All bereft of T.V listings Listening as life slowly drips down onto a stone wall; evaporating Walls of procedure Alone in an armchair Scuffles in car park Chest is opened Gloating, bloating Never knowing that growing, knowing nothing has the point that requires effort All bereft of T.V listings Listening as life slowly drips down onto a stone wall; evaporating Surgical procedure Piss on a claustrophobic soul Standard procedure Procedure Gloating, bloating Never knowing that growing, knowing nothing has the point that requires effort All bereft of T.V listings Listening as life slowly drips down onto a stone wall; evaporating & then there’s you
8.
It’s gone now, you can go away Spiders might laugh at what you might say Whatever you do try to avoid this sentimental tripe Sat in the corner growing older with spite It’s a tragic habit Belly laughing with you But I don’t want to know You can take my place & try to pick & choose Still I don’t want you to go It happened again I’ll wait until the end I don’t want to know Thinking bores me so let’s see what happens when you know what if everyone tried tonight? Diatribe Beneath life is still there It’s just scared to come out Pretentious; get out of my head Despair is not affirmation of genius I’m just passing through & you tried so hard to Constant irritation Now sober i start shaking It’s a tragic habit Belly laughing with you But I don’t want to know You can take my place & try to pick & choose Still I don’t want you to go It happened again No reaction Instead your pale flesh says instant recognition & endless repetition never made any sense Tell them they know too well Remind me to never dwell again
9.
I’ve got the best seat in the house If I was any closer I’d be too close I’m never, never going to appear Terror, terror You can tell I’m going to appear Terror, tell her You can tell
10.
Don’t expect me to still be on the bed I will tomorrow make the world mine All done with the kind of mild delusion to cause others confusion Only serving to mildly amuse me I’ll ask again Always the same Too painfully plain Well never again Forget it all I don’t walk, i crawl Forget it myself Put down the belt It was brief, bleak, beak but it all made sense Hence i never wasted time on such a foolish pretence that i insist upon Now that nobody needs us Nobody needs us now I know you’ve got reason to be as a joke of a man as me I know you know that we’re not the same & it’s all just such a shame I know you’ve got no reason to be as shit a human being as me but the worst thing that I’ve ever known is to think friends like you when they really don’t

about

Recorded at Dubrek Studios between January 2005 & May 2006 by Jay & Ollie
Releases by Cowboy Democracy

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released July 1, 2006

Callum Holmes - Bass
Maria Machin - Guitar, Vocals
Tomas Ward - Drums

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My Psychoanalyst Derby, UK

Too low brow to be high brow. Too high brow to be low brow.

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